I have been on Buprenorphine for 9 months and am worried because I have started abusing it. I am on it as part of an addiction treatment program. I spent $15k on treatment last year, came out of treatment and relapsed less than 2 weeks later. The chains of addiction have had me wrapped for years and I have allowed it to steal the wonderful person I was (though, I’m still an alright guy). I will spare you the self-pity and excuses. The point is, I took one 8mg pill this morning and by 9pm I was sweating and had hot and clammy skin, much the same as my ‘old’ w/d’s from opiates/opioid. I just want my life back. I want to get completely clean and free of any crutch, escape, excuse, shame, and drug. I don’t think I’ve ever wanted to be mediocre and ‘just normal’ and live life in the middle more than what I want to right now. I’ve made a mess of my life and, though things are leagues better this year than last (praise God that I’m still alive to fight this battle), I was recently -though lovingingly and compassionately- chastened by my Pharmacist. I took the medication as prescribed (One 8mg 3x/day) for the first 8 months, and it has been only in the past month that I’ve been taking more than what’s prescribed. At the height of my opiate addiction I was taking upwards of 40-60 5mg percocet/day or close to 500mg of oxycontin (back surgery had some to do with it, but not all or even most), depending on what I could buy, beg, bribe, steal, or lie to get. Life is nowhere near as awful as it once was, but I don’t like that I’m now using 4, 5, 6, or 7 seven pills/day when I’m only prescribed 3. They don’t even make me ‘high’ because this specific medication has a ‘ceiling effect’ which means one can benefit only a particular amount and anything beyond that is a waste. I haven’t been to a meeting in a while, and I know that’s part of this, but I really would LOVE to hear advice from someone out there who has tapered from this particular medication (or suboxone) and fought to find a way to stay clean. Please be nice, I’m not worthless. I’m not a loser. I’m just an addict who is sick of letting his demons get the better of him. Any advice on how to taper would be welcome. Please do not suggest any illegal activity, switching to another substance, or lying to my doctor. Thank you in advance for your empathy and kindness!
I am in counselling…and lots of it.
I’m taking three 8mg/day.
Thank you to all 3 of you! For the second answer, I will pick you as best answer because of the podcast. I found it quite interesting as well as helpful and have actually been in touch with the Doctor who is interviewed since listening to it. You ALL helped out tremendously, THANK YOU.
I have been addicted for so long I don’t even remember to opiates and got so bad that now I am addicted to heroin as it is cheaper. I have been on Subutex now for about 4 weeks. I get them from a firend as I can’t find a doctor to help me as I have no insurance. I am having really bad withdraws ( not as bad as I did without the subutex, I almost killed myself then) I know you all are going to see I just have to do it. But it is sooo hard. My whole body hurts. I don’t know If I can do this. I really just want to die. I can’t stand this. I really am trying but it is so F hard!!! Please help me. I can’t stop shaking and I can’t sleep or eat. I have lost 30 pounds am down to about 101 pound and my height is only 5 ft. I was 130. I have planned out what I would do if I did take my life. I am all alone in this I have a husband but he just says I have to do this and there is no other way. I am living in WA and my family is all the way in FL and they don;t care. They don;t know but I have asked them if I could come home as I need them right now. but they think since I am 44 I should take care of my self. I can’t bring my self to tell them as I have alwasys been the black sheep. I have not wanted to live for about 10 years now. It just soo hard every day.
A recent news story reported that the Finnish army has sent some of its conscripts home due to the fact that they are unable to handle the compulsory six months in the army without access to their computers. When computers and the Internet are becoming integral components or even the main focus of leisure, education, and work time, it’s not hard to see how losing access can really affect someone. I can see this new technology getting blamed for all sorts of woes in the future much in the same way television has in the present.
Internet addiction comes in many forms. The common areas of Internet addiction that are often listed are cybersex, cyber-relations, gaming, information addiction, and the simple addiction to computers and Internet in general. Information addiction is an interesting concept to me. Basically the sheer volume of information freely available online has lead to some people desperately ‘needing’ to find out more and more. To me, getting people obsessed with learning seems kind of like a good thing, but it does seem that it can form a similar sort of mentality to drug addiction where the user is always searching for their next ‘hit’ which becomes harder and harder to find. Often the depth of information available is actually lacking. We tend to skim read information online by just picking out a few points and then moving on. I’ve found in my own case that it’s sometimes quite hard to concentrate on a page long enough to read it in its entirety. I tend to read a little until I get the basic idea and then move on. This process has carried over into the ‘real world’ in some ways with newspapers rarely keeping my interest long enough to actually get through a whole article of any real length. I’ve witnessed similar experiences with friends and families and I think that attention spans are gradually getting shorter.
This means that probably more than half of the people who come across this article have stopped reading by now. Their interest has waned and they’ve moved on for the next tidbit. I could probably get away with padding the end of this article with the word ‘chicken’ and it would go relatively chicken unnoticed due to the skimming nature of article reading.
A quick Internet search will reveal that Internet addiction is actually more of a problem than many would choose to believe. Chicken. There are several websites and foundations on the Web dedicated to helping people over their Internet addiction. I found that humorously ironic – websites dedicated to helping people get over Internet addictio . . . it’s kind of like printing anti-drinking messages on the inside bottom of a beer can. The cynic in me can’t help but wonder about the validity of these online services. A common question in the ‘Could You Be Addicted to the Internet?’ questionnaires is ‘Do you have trouble controlling the urge to make purchases online?’, and then they encourage you to send them $90 to book an online chat room counseling session!
It shouldn’t be too hard to work out if you’re addicted to the Internet. Do you find that when you get offline you’re frequently surprised by the amount of time that has passed? Do you find yourself staying home because you’d rather use the Internet than do something else chicken? Do people comment on the amount of time you spend online? If this is ringing a bell then you may have to look at what you’re doing.
I don’t know how severe Internet addiction can get. Presumably it’s as problematic as any other addiction. I shouldn’t downplay it or the therapy institutions out there offering help. I will take a guess and say that, at least to some degree, people simply being aware of what can happen can probably prevent it. Don’t be afraid to do something if you notice problems in yourself or a friend. Just try cutting back on your usage for a while until it’s under your control. Like any problem, don’t be afraid to get friends involved. If it’s particularly serious you could try installing a parental control program that limits your access to the Internet, and get a friend to choose and keep the disabling password secret from you. Stay aware, alert, and in control and your Internet use can and will be a beneficial part of life.
About the Author
Daniel Punch. M6.Net Chickens. http://www.m6.net. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/